Cool Cucumber

…because I can only hear the clock ticking and the occasional car pass on the road.

…because I just heard a train far off, and I was so happy that I could hear a train from here if I listen really carefully. (It reminds me of my childhood friend Katie, who lived in Covington, Georgia. She had railroad tracks right behind her house in her family’s woods, and the trains woke me up at night. But imagine… to have your OWN woods, full of trees to climb and leaves to crunch.)

…because the blue shadows from the windows are nostalgic to me; I don’t know why. I do remember feeling very deeply for the shadows which come into nighttime windows at the age of six, though.

…because I tell myself that everyone is sleeping but me. Now; I do know that I’m not the only one up, but I love the feeling that almost everyone around me in these houses is missing out on this moment.

…because watching the lights of the city is endlessly fascinating. Imagining the lives and people associated with every tiny pin-pricked light is another longtime hobby of mine. Mountains to the west make this especially interesting.

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visit Wag ‘N Wash! Becky and I took our new dogs to the self-serve dog wash today. It was so hilarious to wash our dogs (whom we are sure were never bathed before), and I have the pictures to prove it:

Royal was terrified to even go inside the washing station- he just planted his feet until I had to coax him in with treats!. After a few minutes in the warm water, he relaxed. In this rare moment, he even looks like he’s enjoying himself!

Saber was a good boy as well- he was less anxious than Royal! The only bad moment came when he tried to go for the store cat who happened to amble by.

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Mmmm… Does this look good or what? The cottage cheese mixed in the angel hair pasta is courtesy of Melissa, who really likes when I use her name on the Internet. She taught me how to REALLY eat pasta- in a bowl!

I’ve been thinking about blogging and why I do it; why I started in July. My life has changed immensely in this short period of time, and I guess I want to be sure that I’m doing it for the right reasons. Well, the first was to have a creative outlet (though it’s not always very creative… oh well). I think I’m upholding that end of it. Next, I wanted to keep in touch with some friends who are also technology addicts, and that’s working too. Last, I wanted to be able to write about some things that I still need to work through in real life. It’s always easier to write or type thoughts out before I speak them. This is the part I’m not actually implementing, simply because I’m afraid. I am realizing that I have friends who read this blog, and, just like real life, I don’t want them to be disappointed in me. I tend to present the parts that my family or friends will approve of or pat me on the back for. So for me, this post signals that I want to be as open as I can in writing so that I can transfer it into my living, breathing, speaking to another human face, life. I don’t want to hold back- and if you’re reading this, and continue to read, you are choosing to, despite the disappointments I may throw your way.

I cannot write simply to be read; if I want to be genuine, I have to write my true thoughts as they come to me. (But not ALL… there are some things which must remain sacred!)

Truth: I had a hard time last weekend, and I’m worried about this one coming up. There’s an incredible amount of time to be wasted feeling sorry for oneself when you are lonely. Don’t get me wrong, I have friends, ones I wish I could see more of, and life has taken many of us apart for varying reasons. I understand this. I don’t intend to guilt any of my friends reading this into calling me up, or asking me out for coffee. Rather, I feel like I am being stretched and challenged by this alone time, and I realize that I am finally learning to reach out to others instead of simply waiting to be reached at.

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By the way, have I told you of the song I have my 4th-graders sing about the different types of verbs? Yes, it’s true… and the song is set to the tune of B-I-N-G-O; with 3 separate verses, even. Anyway, I’m sidetracked here…

Had from Boston posted this blog game on her blog, and I of course responded to the challenge:1) Reply with your name and I’ll respond with something random about you.
2) I’ll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3) I’ll pick a flavor/color of jello to wrestle with you in.
4) I’ll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
5) I’ll tell you my first memory of you.
6) I’ll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7) I’ll ask you something that I’ve always wondered about you.
If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. You MUST. It is written.

Had wrote back to me:

ok, your name… baker…
1) you’re my very favorite person to converse with.
2) where the streets have no name — it’s by u2, so that’s a given. but it also has the bleeding heart/sell all my possessions and save the world passion that i associate with you.
3) green. definitely lime green.
4) nu gamma lambda!!!
5) sitting across from you at the caf - you were sitting with nate sidmore and i was with jess myers. we struck up a conversation about the “cup o’ joe” esga propaganda on the table.
6) a cat.
7) are you a liberal!?
8)put it on the cuke zone.

Anyone I know up for this fun blogging game? Just comment and let me know!

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Becky is home again from Ethiopia, rested, and I got to spend the evening with her and Melanie. She gave me a beautiful pendant that looks like two little huts (it’s an antique), and I’m going to put it on a beaded necklace. She also gave me two portraits, painted on goatskin. I think I’ll take pictures of the items so I can display them here… they are beautiful and so special.

I started realizing recently that I need to go to Ethiopia next summer to help out. With my summers off as a teacher, how could I not? I spoke with Becky tonight and she was excited to hear this- I realized that I could easily save up enough to pay for my flight, then staying there would be relatively cheap. I’m so excited with possibilities!

I also thought I’d copy some of Becky’s last post regarding the good news in Ethiopia. Read on:

My six year old niece, Gracie, had given me a baby doll to take with me for a girl in Ethiopia. She was a cute one with three pink outfits and a bottle. I realized that I hadn’t had a chance to give her to the “right” girl. I asked Legesse if he thought Martha, our former Fistula survivor, would be willing to make sure she went to the right home. As I pulled the baby doll out, I wish you could have seen Martha’s face. She had never seen a doll before and had only lost her baby about one year ago. She gasped, and spent about 45 minutes rocking the “baby”, examining the toes, shushing, etc. It was such a time of mourning. Again, one more trauma that the Fistula women have encountered, the loss of a child. Needles to say, our “baby” stayed home with Martha.

On Monday morning, we had a meeting scheduled with USAID. I was hoping for about fifteen minutes to ask some basic questions. We arrived a little early and were escorted into a big conference room. Thirteen people joined our meeting including representatives from the US Embassy. They spent about one hour talking to me. Everyone gave me their card. The team leader told me that she thinks I am truly on the right path and that Congress has just earmarked money that has to be used for Fistula recovery. She said we seem right down the line they are looking for. Hmmmm……. I also had a meeting with the US Embassy. They asked for an article to put in their newsletter about our opening. Yippee!

After lunch with some friends, Legesse and I went on to the Fistula Hospital to meet with Ruth Kennedy. She had lots of great ideas and encouragement. (Dr. Catherine told her I was having some bumps, how embarrassing) She told us a story about when Dr Catherine and her husband began treating Fistula patients. They had to hide them under the stairway so the other patients wouldn’t see them. These are the modern day lepers. And then on to a meeting to sign a six month contract for our compound!!!!!! I got to see it with my own eyes. Guess the color???? Yes, PINK!!!! With a big tree and water to wash with. I’ll be home before we actually get to greet our first women. But….. February isn’t far.

Thank you for all your prayers and letters of encouragement. I’ve sure been learning the lesson about sharing each others burdens. Thank you for sharing mine. See you soon!

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You’re Missouri!
An admirer of the works of Mark Twain and the steamboat lifestyle, you
are happiest when floating gently down the river. You have a strong sense of
independence, a reverence for saints, and even look up to discredited explorers. With all
these traditional influences, it’s no surprise you’re at the center of everyone you know,
and are even considered a gateway to the future. If only you could stop drinking the
world’s worst beer, you’d be set.
Take the State Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

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(Inspired by Rob’s baking experience and photo…)

We are officially in the middle of baking season since we have already had one snow here in Colorado. I have been inspired to make all sorts of cozy foods this week, but the best of all was the apple crisp that I made yesterday. Here’s a pic for your viewing pleasure, then I’ll tell you the details:

I decided after my last crisp that I needed to try a version that was slightly healthier (a whole stick of butter in the last recipe just couldn’t be good for you). So… the finished product this time had whole wheat flower instead of white, a few oats tossed in for good measure, 4 tablespoons of Smart Balance spread (all heart-healthy canola, safflower, and olive oils), applesauce for consistency, and a little Splenda for sweetness.

And it’s good. I eat it and taste the goodness of the baked apples inside. However, last time the topping was luxurious and rich, with a delicate crunch when you bit into it. My topping’s a little chewier this time, and doesn’t have the same consistency as the last time.

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I can’t wait for the new Cash movie. I just saw this video for the first time… absolutely breathtaking, with the flock of birds flying toward the sky just like Johnny left this earth shortly afterward. I felt myself choking up because of the power of what he is saying in this song. The video is so reminiscent of a younger man, and yet through his accomplishments and trophy case, he still sings,

“And you can have it all; my empire of dirt….”

Play this movie for the experience:

Music Video Codes by VideoCodeZone.com

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I saw this absolutely horrifying, incredibly shocking movie tonight. It’s an example of the abuses that can happen when the Church has absolute power. This movie, based on a true story, tells of the young women in Ireland who were sent to the Catholic-run Magdalen Asylums for “fallen women” in the mid-1900’s. At this time in Ireland, the Church had the most power of any person or institution, especially when it concerned young women and morality. The DVD also includes a special documentary with interviews with some of the women who were incarcerated, some as young as 14.

In the Magdalen Asylums, women were made to work in silence in the laundry facilities all day with no pay, in order to pay penance for sexual immorality. The movie shows the abuse that occurred regularly at the hands of nuns (beatings, inhumane verbal abuse, and most horrifying, the shaving of long hair). Those sent to the Magdalen Asylums by their parents or priests went for having a child out of wedlock or being sexually immoral. Some were even there because they had been sexually violated and their families had abandoned them. Young women who were considered “flirtatious” or “too pretty” were also sent to the Magdalen laundries in order to prevent them from the inevitable “falling away”.

The shocking thing is that the last Magdalen Asylum was closed in 1996. Nine years ago. It is thought that there were over 30,000 who stayed at the Magdalen Asylums. If you’d like to learn more, there’s an excellent article here from Wikipedia.

The movie was sobering, and it made me think of the lies told to the Magdalens, as well as some of the things we sometimes tell young women today about their sexuality. The nuns told the women that sex was a sin, and that they had to work as hard as possible, avoiding all fleshly things in order to receive forgiveness from God. Sounds a little familiar…

In this movie, there was a lot of talk about living for God by the nuns, especially when they were chastising a Magdalen. They spoke of Him but lacked any evidence of love. Sadly, many former Magdalens have turned away from the church as a result of their abuse; and I can’t really blame them.

One of the women’s closing words from the documentary:

“I didn’t see anything Godly in that church, I didn’t see anything Christ-ly. All I saw was a bunch of bullies. That was all I… a bunch of bullies. And- devils dressed up in nuns’ habits, that’s the way I looked at it.”

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Yep, this picture should explain it all.

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